Seinfeld and Curb Your Enthusiasm belong to two different eras of television, but they are spiritually connected. Both shows are about misanthropes who often get into needling problems of their own design. And, as most people already know, Larry David is one of the creators of Seinfeld and the character of George Costanza is said to be based on him.
There is a crucial question that must be asked, though. Who is a worse person? George Costanza or Larry David? Who is the bigger degenerate? It might be too close to call.
George: Killed His Wife
Just as Larry did with Loretta Black, George did everything he could to get out of his relationship with Susan. And it ended up killing her.
Granted, George does not intentionally kill Susan. However, he does put the ball in motion to do so, leading to her envelope poisoning. And when he gets the news about her death, he can hardly be bothered to care That is pretty low.
Larry: Killed His Friend's Nephew
In the world of Curb, Cheryl, Loretta, and anyone Larry was romantically involved with remains alive (unlike Susan). That does not mean, though, that everyone has survived or come out unscathed.
In season nine, Larry hires a prostitute for Marty Funkho's nephew, which sets in motion a domino effect that leads to the nephew's death in Spain. Is it Larry's fault? Only indirectly. But in Funkho's book, that's plenty of cause for evil.
George: Bad In A Fire
When a fire breaks out in a small apartment, there are a number of guidelines to follow. Do not incite panic, help people in danger, and proceed with caution.
In the Seinfeld episode, "The Fire," George ends up at a child's birthday party when a fire breaks out. George does none of the required things to take charge or help. Instead, he immediately shouts "Fire!" and sprints from the apartment, shoving people out of his way. This is selfish and life-threatening!
Larry: Put TiVo Over Cheryl
The guidelines for a fire are much more common than guidelines for TiVo. But that does not mean that Larry should not have known about them.
When Cheryl calls from a turbulent plane ride to profess her love for Larry in case she dies, Larry ignores her outright. But it's not for a good reason (if one could exist). It's because he's paying attention to the TiVo technician instead of Cheryl in her hour of need. This, of course, leads to their separation.
George: IV Removal
Of all the injuries that George caused throughout Seinfeld, there is one that is the clear worst. The character of Neil, described as a shorter version of George, becomes a subject of infatuation for Mr. Costanza.
Neil surely regrets the moment when he became involved in the lives of the Seinfeld characters. George becomes so obsessed with him that he intentionally removes his IV from his body when Neil ends up in the hospital. George caused many injuries, but this one was 100 percent intentional.
Larry: Trips Shaq
Speaking of unintentional injuries, Larry David caused an extremely consequential event when he attended a Lakers game with courtside seats. For whatever reason, he felt the need to stick his legs out straight on to the court while watching the game by the Lakers bench.
Of course, NBA big man.
George: The Human Fund
Ever the cheapskate, George comes up with an ingenious and cruelly frugal plan to get away with giving his co-workers no-cost gifts for the holidays. He pretends to donate money to "The Human Fund" in their names.
This is not a real charity, though. So not only is George lying to his co-workers and being cheap with the holidays, he is also making up a charity. It's not even a clever name for a charity!
Larry: Ignoring Lewis
It is one thing to defraud your co-workers, lie to them, and treat them poorly on a consistent basis. It is another to do this with someone who is a lifelong friend.
Larry is constantly putting his friend, Richard Lewis, through the ringer when it comes to maintain their companionship. Whenever they plan to get lunch together, Larry will always either flake completely or be exceedingly late for the meal. That's just being a bad friend.
George: Pretends To Be Handicapped
In "The Butter Shave" episode of Seinfeld, George pretends that he is handicapped to secure a job. Obviously, this backfires and George ends up losing the job when he blows his cover after being chased by other handicapped people.
The amount of people who George leaves feeling irate in his wake is quite a large amount by the end of the show. But this might be one of his most heinous acts.
Larry: Pretends To Be Handicapped
On Curb, Larry is often portrayed as the real-life version of George Costanza. (The characters are based off one another, after all). So it makes complete sense that Larry has also pretended to have a disability.
In fact, he does this multiple times over the course of Curb, never once learning his lesson. These two characters might just be kindred spirits. Maybe neither is worse than the other. Maybe they just deserve each other.